Unexpected Benefits of Being Friendzoned

  1. Keeps your Friday nights free for watching HGTV (or binge drinking with your other loser single friends).
  2. More quality time spent with your cat.
  3. Save on birth control.
  4. Free to see other people, like Ben & Jerry’s.
  5. Can ask for favors without trading for sexual ones.
  6. Free to fuck his friends.
  7. Save money on chiropractors as you can skip the stilettos.
  8. No need to wax your mustache off.
  9. Find out all his dirty little secrets as he isn’t trying to hide anything from you.
  10. Freedom to fart freely.
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