Pop Quiz: Let’s talk about dance!
Posted On May 5, 2021
1. Flamenco dancers stomp to
a. accent the rhythm of the music
b. get the waitress’s attention for that round of drinks they ordered an hour ago, damn it!
c. symbolically crush the soul of every bastard who ever stood them up on a Friday night
2. What do belly dance and stripping have in common?
a. Exotic dance has its roots in a 1800s World’s Fair exhibition of belly dance which seized the American imagination
b. serpentine movements and figure 8 hip sways
c. Lots of fat/ugly wannabes who insist they really don’t want no man’s validation no matter how little they wear or much they shake their tits around
3. Square dance isn’t popular as it used to be because
a. the music is passé
b. “do si do your partner” is unfortunately not a euphemism for dry humping on the dance floor
c. kids these days don’t get to see the good Bugs Bunny cartoons like the one where he makes two hillbillies almost kill each other square dancing
4. In order to excel at traditional Polish dance, you must
a. be able to twirl endlessly without puking (for girls) or be able to jump and kick (for men)
b. love the sound of the accordion
c. have a drinking problem, same as Irish dance.
5. A key feature of traditional Bavarian dance is
a. the wearing of dirndls and lederhosen
b. Holding hands and walking around in a circle while the tuba farts
c. finishing off by marching on Warsaw.